Life, As I Know It

Thursday, October 10, 2013

There comes a point in some people's lives where you just start wondering, "what the hell have I done with myself?!" I've started to ask myself this a lot lately. What the hell am I doing? What the hell do I really want to be doing?! Why haven't I achieved any major goals yet!? I think most of these unsettling thoughts are from the realization that there's a huge life changing event happening in just a few weeks.

I'm starting to feel the stress, the anxiety the nervousness and all these roller coaster feelings all at once. I just wish at this point in my life, I was more prepared, more goal oriented when I was younger, smarter about the stupid choices I've made in the past. Maybe if I stopped comparing my life to other people's I wouldn't feel this way? But it's hard, I look at my boyfriend and the amazing career he has and start to worry. I worry about not having a stable career, not finding a job after we both were done school, about not being able to contribute equally in our relationship. I start to panic, have many sleepless nights, I stress all day and keep it hidden deep down so Israel doesn't worry. But I'm worried. I'm scared. I'm stressed. I'm sad. 

The more effort I put into making my life stable, the more it back fires on me. I'm now just hoping that at some point in this crazy life, that there's the right path for me, a path that will lead me to happiness, stability and not a handful of crazy, mixed emotions. A path where I can say "this is what I've been looking for my whole life" or least something I can enjoy doing....


- The Cassie Paige

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3 Comments

  1. I know what you mean! Sometimes, we need to slow down, put our plans into action, pray and wait patiently. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and keeping it real.

    ♥, www.Styleat30.com – Fashion, Food, Travel

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  2. I been feeling the same lately. We have these days sometimes. I hope everything will go well with you.

    xo
    Sam
    http://fabulouspetite.blogspot.com

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  3. Unfortunately around here, and thanks to the crisis, there are many young people who are lost, and of course envy those who have stable job and others! Let's see if we soon found our way!

    Greetings! You in my blog.
    http://victimofmycloset.blogspot.com.es

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